How It All Got Started Part II
How It All Got Started Part II
January 29, 2019
…Fast forward to 2019. It has been nearly six years since that incredible day when I paid attention to what it was that I was truly in need of when I craved chocolate and knew better than to eat it. Since then, life has blossomed. How? Let me explain.
In 2013 I was coming out of a very deep and dark place. My support system included my therapist and 4 cats. I traveled voraciously to escape the reality of what my life had become, attended Opera (it was the only non-therapeutic place where I felt safe enough to express emotions), and ate sweets- lots of sweets. Sweets were my homies (or so I thought)! When I realized I couldn’t eat sweets anymore and especially in the amount I had been eating (at times over 6 or 7 servings per day), I began journaling to help me understand the source of those sweet cravings. Journaling helped me make sense of what was happening in my inner world and why I was craving whatever it was that I was craving at any given point. Awareness began to form within me and realizations that I had not experienced prior began to surface. Suddenly I went from being virtually checked out of my life to listening to my cravings, deciphering their deeper mental and emotional messages, and taking steps towards building a life by my own design. The life I began building was now guided by my inner wisdom.
Ever since I was a child, I distinctly remember wanting to accomplish two things in this life, I wanted to be in a healing profession and create a beautiful family structure with me as a loving matriarch. In 2012, I thought I was finally close to it, and I was, until it all came crashing down in one short go. I guess the universe had other plans for me. I had to learn more.
From 2012 until 2015 I spent time looking deeply at my own cravings, journaling the wisdom I was gaining from them, healing my inner wounds, and (although I did not know it at that time) building the foundation of what would become my wellness company.
Now you may think, “how did your cravings guide your life and help you build Blossomed Life, LLC and move you towards a loving relationship?” Let’s dive deeper!
In late 2017 after a two and a half year hiatus from dating and briefly diving into the craziness of the NYC dating scene, I swore off dating for good! I was going to work exclusively on my new career as a holistic nutritionist and help others heal their eating problems. I literally made a mental pact with myself to absolutely never ever be caught up in the emotional mess of what Manhattan dating has become. Then, in late March of 2018 and into Early April, I began having very frequent and strong cravings for all things sweet. From doing my own inner work and with my clients I immediately knew what was happening, my gut was telling me to date. But my mind was saying, “HELL NO!” See, the job of the mind is to keep your body safe and on this planet, until you fulfill on what it is that you came here to do. One way my mind kept me safe was to swear off dating. My inner wisdom had else in mind. I distinctly remember saying to my gut voice, “I hear you. I hear your desire for romance in your life. I don’t have anyone to date right now; if someone comes into my life, I will give it a shot. And meanwhile I’ll have a cookie to get me through the day.”
In late April and early May I started running into my now partner at social events. Every time I ran into him I thought to myself, “What a great guy, I just wish I could date someone half as amazing as he is.” When he asked me out, I was shocked. I simply couldn’t believe it! All sorts of emotions started running through me and most importantly my mind started screaming, “WARNING! WARNING! DANGER ZONE!” That was my mind offering me all sorts of tools to “preserve me from harm.” Based on my past dating experiences, men were dangerous and not to be trusted. Little did I know that my now partner would change all of those preconceptions. Reluctantly, I gave it a try. Our first date was six and a half hours our second was even longer. After that, we lost track of time we spent together. I am writing this not to bore you with my dating success story but to showcase that paying attention to your cravings (especially emotional food cravings) can and most likely will be life changing for you as well.
Another way listening to my cravings has helped me in my life fulfillment is when late last fall I began craving large meals. Typically I have some fruit, vegetables and a small number of whole grains and healthy proteins for my evening meals. During that time period, I craved HUGE meals. I just couldn’t get enough…support. Growing up food was a way that my caregivers said they love me and I always made sure to eat before, and at times during, big events. Food was a way of receiving support. When my company started suddenly bursting at the seams with opportunities, I knew I had to hire support. Given my unsavory past experiences with people, I waited until the very last moment to reach out for help. Once I opened that portal, a team of incredible support began to emerge. Yes, it was scary for Ms. Hella-Independent to rely on others, but the company needed it and I am not a magician that can do a few weeks of work in one day.
Again, how did I get past my emotional eating crutch? I paid attention to my cravings, journaled what I was experiencing, used my self-created tools such as the Cravings LogTM to observe what was coming up for me on a deeper level, took small steps toward moving forward with my life fulfillment, pleaded with my mind to let me pass my self-created barriers, and every time I passed my own berries did a happy dance and took note of how incredible it is to follow your own dream (for future self-inflicted, barrier-laden moments).
I built my now amazing life on leaning into my food and lifestyle cravings and now I coach others to do the same. I conduct private sessions, small to large size craving analysis and life fulfillment workshops. I conduct cravings events in schools, homes, and places of work and leisure. Once one of those places was good ole’ NYC Google Headquarters. One of the participants said he had never seen “Googlers” in their work habitat open up about what their true needs were and what they were dealing with in their various areas of life. In his words, “it was refreshing!” We all have deep inner needs that since unseen by the “naked eye” are not shone a light on. Leaning into our cravings and uncovering the wisdom they hold can and will bring you closer to your very own life fulfillment.
Drop me a line. I can tap into your inner wisdom too.